I'm so disgruntled today..... what a day. well, really what a week. First my video card went debunk, and likes to shut off whenever i do anything graphic intensive. which if you know me, i play world of warcraft like crazy. So, we've been trying to figure that out all week, and it alone is stressing me out.
Then to day my mom's follow up appt for her surgery was today and we wanted to get some running done before, and after really. we get in my car, and something starts clunking.... so we stop at a sheetz and everytime you turn the wheel it clunks...apparently a wheel bearing or something went. great. so we went back and took my moms car, who's power steering was so bad, we stopped to get some for it. turns out her water pump was, well, dripping like a fountain. so here we are, with no cars, her appt is today, and we have to drive to Syracuse NY on thursday for my oncologist appt......
i want Jonny home :( he knows what to do when this shit happens not me. i'm just lost without him :( and everything explodes when he's not here :(
uggggggggggggggggggggggg
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Sunday, December 7, 2008
I'm alive!
i swear it! just been moving about, the first place i was supposed to stay in didn't work out, but luckily my great aunt had an apt, and i'm now living with my mom again LOL. which is okay since she's having surgery tomorrow lol. anyway more later :)
Jessica
Jessica
Friday, October 17, 2008
My poor girl
This is the infamous E-collar. And the t-shirt >.> now you tell me how she ate a bag of dog food, and finagled outta that shirt!
\
and one of salem and jonny just for cuteness :)
But anyway, Time is ticking. Jonny's leaving in a few days. the lovely army moved up his leave date:( only by two days, but still thats two days we had together! I knew, at least deep down that they would move his date, the old one has been in effect for months and months now. Last time he went to Iraq the date changed 7 times before they left, so it was more just waiting for it. :( silly army.
I have to go in for blood work sometime soon, to see if i have to stay on synthroid or not, i'm hoping not. although its the tiniest of my pills being back down to 9 pills a night is better then 10 right? Plus, if i can get off those, it may help my weight loss again, even though its not guarenteed, its still something to look foward too! Oh, and this prgesterone i'm on? about 10ish everynight i start getting the worst case of munchies i've ever had! and thats saying a lot if you know anything about my " wilder" days >.> /innocent i swear. its horrible to resist, so i started just not buying munchies. Its killing me, but i rarely feel like cooking at 10pm, so its working so far! lol.
anywho thats all for now. :) talk to you laters I'm sure.
\and one of salem and jonny just for cuteness :)
But anyway, Time is ticking. Jonny's leaving in a few days. the lovely army moved up his leave date:( only by two days, but still thats two days we had together! I knew, at least deep down that they would move his date, the old one has been in effect for months and months now. Last time he went to Iraq the date changed 7 times before they left, so it was more just waiting for it. :( silly army.
I have to go in for blood work sometime soon, to see if i have to stay on synthroid or not, i'm hoping not. although its the tiniest of my pills being back down to 9 pills a night is better then 10 right? Plus, if i can get off those, it may help my weight loss again, even though its not guarenteed, its still something to look foward too! Oh, and this prgesterone i'm on? about 10ish everynight i start getting the worst case of munchies i've ever had! and thats saying a lot if you know anything about my " wilder" days >.> /innocent i swear. its horrible to resist, so i started just not buying munchies. Its killing me, but i rarely feel like cooking at 10pm, so its working so far! lol.
anywho thats all for now. :) talk to you laters I'm sure.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Hiya :)
So i went to bed really early last night. Well, early for me anyway, about 9 o'clock. To be truthful, i read maybe for about an hour, I just started Brisingr :D. But after a fitful night of sleeping i woke up at 6 am with a headache :( there's not much worse then waking up with a headache :(.
As a result of said headache, i don't feel like doing much of anything today. I walked into the laundry room, and was pleasently surprised that jonny had switched laundry, only to then notice he didn't fold them, just tossed 'em in a basket on the floor :(. Typically man lol. But all i could bring myself to do was sigh at them and walk away. I did manage to start a pot roast, but really thats minimal work anyway, so it sort of fits in with the theme. lol.
Jon's mom came up for a few days this weekend, it was nice. Although i felt bad, since she's an early riser, and well, we're not >.> Jonny Normally is, but he's been on block leave for two weeks, and staying up late with me. so noon has been our morning wake up ;) Its gonna be a rude awakening whenever we do have kids LOL!
OH, on that subject, I think i've touched on it before, about the amount of people who stood up and offered to be a surragate if this cancer took a nasty turn, But most of them there was something that i thought would be a deterant, like one had their tubes tied, one was menopausal. Turns out, at least from what little i can find that both of these people can still carry babies to term. There isn't much of a point to this, but my amazement at what modern science can discover/do. And if the worst happens and i lose my uterus this is a real possibility for me. I would like one biological child, then i'm happy to adopt :D. I want a large family, and i will have it >.> /determined!
Other then that i'm feeling fine, doing fine, just a little overwhelmed with everything going on here. Jon leaves in a week and a half, i move in a about 2 weeks. Even that i don't know how to feel. I am very excited to be moving back home, but saddened by the reasoning why. I don't want him to leave, but i want to be home already. Its confusing, and my eagerness to get home makes me feel like a bad wife. Don't get me wrong i can barely talk about him leaving, I don't want him to go, its just weird having completely oppisite feelings/emotions beating at my head.
OMGoff topic, random story. While his mom was up, we went out to dinner, and then to a local comedy club. We, of course, left kira and salem at home, and put the E-Collar ( big ol' cone thing) on kira. After Moving anything glass she would inevitably knock over, we were confident she would be okay, and left at about 4. about 11 o clock i came home to the weirdest events i have ever experienced in my pet owning life. Kira, being the neurotic dog that she is, somehow managed to do the impossible. We have a T-shirt on her, to deter her from picking at her stitches, she somehow, managed to take off the t-shirt, over her cone, and leave it in the hallway. She also managed to eat ( mind you in a E COLLAR!) a bag of salems Dog food, then puke it all over my new couch and throw pillows. I can not for the life of me figure out how she ate it. all i can imagine is a scoop and catch method.... which makes me giggle uncontrollably. I'll take a pic of her in the collar tonight so you can get an idea of this. it really is absurd. she also poo'd all over. it was crazy. So needless to say we learned our lesson and she will NOT be staying home alone with the E-collar -_-
anywho that was my weekend >.> how's yours?
As a result of said headache, i don't feel like doing much of anything today. I walked into the laundry room, and was pleasently surprised that jonny had switched laundry, only to then notice he didn't fold them, just tossed 'em in a basket on the floor :(. Typically man lol. But all i could bring myself to do was sigh at them and walk away. I did manage to start a pot roast, but really thats minimal work anyway, so it sort of fits in with the theme. lol.
Jon's mom came up for a few days this weekend, it was nice. Although i felt bad, since she's an early riser, and well, we're not >.> Jonny Normally is, but he's been on block leave for two weeks, and staying up late with me. so noon has been our morning wake up ;) Its gonna be a rude awakening whenever we do have kids LOL!
OH, on that subject, I think i've touched on it before, about the amount of people who stood up and offered to be a surragate if this cancer took a nasty turn, But most of them there was something that i thought would be a deterant, like one had their tubes tied, one was menopausal. Turns out, at least from what little i can find that both of these people can still carry babies to term. There isn't much of a point to this, but my amazement at what modern science can discover/do. And if the worst happens and i lose my uterus this is a real possibility for me. I would like one biological child, then i'm happy to adopt :D. I want a large family, and i will have it >.> /determined!
Other then that i'm feeling fine, doing fine, just a little overwhelmed with everything going on here. Jon leaves in a week and a half, i move in a about 2 weeks. Even that i don't know how to feel. I am very excited to be moving back home, but saddened by the reasoning why. I don't want him to leave, but i want to be home already. Its confusing, and my eagerness to get home makes me feel like a bad wife. Don't get me wrong i can barely talk about him leaving, I don't want him to go, its just weird having completely oppisite feelings/emotions beating at my head.
OMGoff topic, random story. While his mom was up, we went out to dinner, and then to a local comedy club. We, of course, left kira and salem at home, and put the E-Collar ( big ol' cone thing) on kira. After Moving anything glass she would inevitably knock over, we were confident she would be okay, and left at about 4. about 11 o clock i came home to the weirdest events i have ever experienced in my pet owning life. Kira, being the neurotic dog that she is, somehow managed to do the impossible. We have a T-shirt on her, to deter her from picking at her stitches, she somehow, managed to take off the t-shirt, over her cone, and leave it in the hallway. She also managed to eat ( mind you in a E COLLAR!) a bag of salems Dog food, then puke it all over my new couch and throw pillows. I can not for the life of me figure out how she ate it. all i can imagine is a scoop and catch method.... which makes me giggle uncontrollably. I'll take a pic of her in the collar tonight so you can get an idea of this. it really is absurd. she also poo'd all over. it was crazy. So needless to say we learned our lesson and she will NOT be staying home alone with the E-collar -_-
anywho that was my weekend >.> how's yours?
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Updates Updates Updates
Ug what a week. Things have been moving. I'm still packing, and getting a lot done, it just seems slower then I wanted. Also i seem to be running low on good size boxes.
After Living with Jonny for almost 8 years we have accumlated a lot of JUNK. And i mean junk. It doesn't help that i seem to have a gene for "pack rattery", lol. I actually found a phone jack, not weird enough you say? it still had teh wires that go up into the wall attatched... still not weird enough? Last time we messed with phone jacks was 5 years ago. Somehow it managed to travel with us from Ohio to New york. I've managed to supress the pack rat gene, and threw out a great many trash bags full of useless things. That made me feel much better. although i seem to have somehow inherited an entire box full of those 70-80's knit throws that are all green yellow and Orange.... Who thought up that color combination??? its horrible. I was just going to pitch them, but a great friend mentioned she thought she knew of a charity that took old blankets for those who had none, they aren't great, but something to keep you warm doesn't have to be pretty. If any one knows of such a charity let me know.
Oh, i got the Pathology back on Kira, her tumor was stage II, so thats not great. But its not the worst, we mostly have to watch to see if it comes back. She's doing great, although killing me with that evil sad look when we put the E-Collar on her at night. I just can't afford another 400 dollars if she decides to rip out the stitches -_-. But she's already bugging to go out back for a run, so i'm assuming she's feeling dandy ;)
OH. the worst part of this week? Apparently my Aunt passed away. Last week. Noone decided to tell me or my sister. so we missed the calling hours and everything. Needless to say we are very not happy with that side of the family right now. She was a wonderful aunt, and I would have liked to have gone. sigh
anywho thats my updates, here soon i'll be without internet, till around the first, although i'm not sure when the internet will be turned off. we'll see. well have a good week folks :)
After Living with Jonny for almost 8 years we have accumlated a lot of JUNK. And i mean junk. It doesn't help that i seem to have a gene for "pack rattery", lol. I actually found a phone jack, not weird enough you say? it still had teh wires that go up into the wall attatched... still not weird enough? Last time we messed with phone jacks was 5 years ago. Somehow it managed to travel with us from Ohio to New york. I've managed to supress the pack rat gene, and threw out a great many trash bags full of useless things. That made me feel much better. although i seem to have somehow inherited an entire box full of those 70-80's knit throws that are all green yellow and Orange.... Who thought up that color combination??? its horrible. I was just going to pitch them, but a great friend mentioned she thought she knew of a charity that took old blankets for those who had none, they aren't great, but something to keep you warm doesn't have to be pretty. If any one knows of such a charity let me know.
Oh, i got the Pathology back on Kira, her tumor was stage II, so thats not great. But its not the worst, we mostly have to watch to see if it comes back. She's doing great, although killing me with that evil sad look when we put the E-Collar on her at night. I just can't afford another 400 dollars if she decides to rip out the stitches -_-. But she's already bugging to go out back for a run, so i'm assuming she's feeling dandy ;)
OH. the worst part of this week? Apparently my Aunt passed away. Last week. Noone decided to tell me or my sister. so we missed the calling hours and everything. Needless to say we are very not happy with that side of the family right now. She was a wonderful aunt, and I would have liked to have gone. sigh
anywho thats my updates, here soon i'll be without internet, till around the first, although i'm not sure when the internet will be turned off. we'll see. well have a good week folks :)
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
When it Rains, It Pours.
So, I've been feeling right with the world. I got my uhaul truck for the move, even finagled 50 extra miles, and 2 more days for free. So i could move stuff to the storage bin, which i also purchased. Got my move out date, inspection, and bulk pick up dates set. My mom is coming up for a week of utter boredom/cleaning/packing ( what we are going to do without internet noone knows!!! we'll probably end up in the corner rocking!) And then i was brushing my dog, and she started shying away when I got to her leg. Upon inspection, i found a lump. a round thing, about the size of a half dollar -_-;
SO, i call the vet, schedule an appt, which was today. Turns out, she has cancer. I'm so upset. She's my baby! she's 8 years old, and i've had her all that time. So we're having 'rushed' surgery on thursday to remove the tumor, and then we wait on the pathology, to see if its stage 1,2,or 3. I don't know why it strikes me so weird that Canine cancer is treated so much the same to Human cancer. I guess cancer is cancer no matter where it is.
Apparently they even have chemo and radiation for dogs. But i don't think i can do that to her. There was one guy whose dog lived 7 months into chemo, by the end of it he had to drag his dog screaming, into the hospital. I don't think i can inflict that on her, even if it would up her survival rate a bit. Not to mention the 8,000-10,000 dollar bills. I don't know. all we can hope is its stage one, and it will be over with on thursday. I don't want to give her up yet :(
Kira and our old dog niko, the heffer XD
she was so adorable as a puppy!
i want to share how came to adopt her, but the details involve some sensitive events that i need to ask my mother if i can share, so we will see :)
SO, i call the vet, schedule an appt, which was today. Turns out, she has cancer. I'm so upset. She's my baby! she's 8 years old, and i've had her all that time. So we're having 'rushed' surgery on thursday to remove the tumor, and then we wait on the pathology, to see if its stage 1,2,or 3. I don't know why it strikes me so weird that Canine cancer is treated so much the same to Human cancer. I guess cancer is cancer no matter where it is.
Apparently they even have chemo and radiation for dogs. But i don't think i can do that to her. There was one guy whose dog lived 7 months into chemo, by the end of it he had to drag his dog screaming, into the hospital. I don't think i can inflict that on her, even if it would up her survival rate a bit. Not to mention the 8,000-10,000 dollar bills. I don't know. all we can hope is its stage one, and it will be over with on thursday. I don't want to give her up yet :(
Kira and our old dog niko, the heffer XD
she was so adorable as a puppy!
i want to share how came to adopt her, but the details involve some sensitive events that i need to ask my mother if i can share, so we will see :)
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Okay
Okay so. Sorry to have left you hanging, all two of you ;). I wanted to have my facts straight.
So i went to the oncologist in Syracuse, but its a teaching hospital and no one there has ever heard of PCOS -_- So that was a lot of explaining. the doctor himself was okay. although he came in at one point told me to " take everything off then i will examine you". i sorta blinked as he walked out. See, he didn't give me any gowns >.> i wasn't about to parade around in my Birthday suit! but shortly after decided i was gonna start rooting through drawers the nurse came in and got them out for me. I got Undressed and sat on the bed and a few minutes late ( no more then 2 min) he came in. Like just came in....Didn't Knock at all! good thing i wasn't doing a jig or something >.> crazy doctors. Not to mention from his exam i was sore for two days after >.> TMI i know but still, how big were his hands?????
But anyway. He gave me progesterone, or at least a script for it. and told me to come back in 3 months. thats about it. Not worth me driving in downtown Syracuse :( OH and i owe the parkin garage 6 dollars.... which i have no clue how to pay cause, seriously i couldn't understand a word the lady was saying. I just sat and nodded my head and tried not to cry. I was REAL nervous about finding my way back to teh freeway.... which actually turned out to be easier then getting off the freeway.
But thats where i stand. sounds like fun right? i take my first dose tonight. we'll see how it goes. But at least my HUbby is home for a little under 4 weeks :D then its off to Iraq, and me off to Ohio. anywho there's an update :D have fun with that ;)
So i went to the oncologist in Syracuse, but its a teaching hospital and no one there has ever heard of PCOS -_- So that was a lot of explaining. the doctor himself was okay. although he came in at one point told me to " take everything off then i will examine you". i sorta blinked as he walked out. See, he didn't give me any gowns >.> i wasn't about to parade around in my Birthday suit! but shortly after decided i was gonna start rooting through drawers the nurse came in and got them out for me. I got Undressed and sat on the bed and a few minutes late ( no more then 2 min) he came in. Like just came in....Didn't Knock at all! good thing i wasn't doing a jig or something >.> crazy doctors. Not to mention from his exam i was sore for two days after >.> TMI i know but still, how big were his hands?????
But anyway. He gave me progesterone, or at least a script for it. and told me to come back in 3 months. thats about it. Not worth me driving in downtown Syracuse :( OH and i owe the parkin garage 6 dollars.... which i have no clue how to pay cause, seriously i couldn't understand a word the lady was saying. I just sat and nodded my head and tried not to cry. I was REAL nervous about finding my way back to teh freeway.... which actually turned out to be easier then getting off the freeway.
But thats where i stand. sounds like fun right? i take my first dose tonight. we'll see how it goes. But at least my HUbby is home for a little under 4 weeks :D then its off to Iraq, and me off to Ohio. anywho there's an update :D have fun with that ;)
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
big day tomorrow
Well tomarrow is my appointment with the Gyn/oncologist. I'm nervous. And a little scared. i'm not sure what to expect, almost all the research i've done on endometrial carcinoma says that Hysterectomy is the course of action. I definetly don't want that. seriously, no. But as far as i know we are just doing a D&C and hormone therapy. I'm really hoping he realizes how determined i am to do just that.
But i have to say, i have some of the best family and friends. Aarika, Rachel, and carol all offered to be surrigates for me Lol! i haven't even went down that route longer then a passing thought. I do have to say while if the unthinkable Does happen, i would probably go that route for one child. But after that i would just adopt. I've always wanted to adopt, so its not that far from my original plans anyway. oh well till tomarrow, when i find out the plan.
Oh and i packed like 4 boxes today! and started like 3 others YAY me! hehe
Oh and much love to my ohio family. a lot of columbiana is out of power from a huge wind storm that hit monday or tuesday. I know rachel said Friday was the estimate on when they would get it back, or something like that. and Grandma and grandpa out of power also -_-
Love ya guys, and even anyone else who wanders by!
PS: Parents, wild turkeys are mean.... Stopping traffic to let your 8 yr old out of the car to chase them is NOT a good idea.... Now you know, and knowing is half the battle ;)
But i have to say, i have some of the best family and friends. Aarika, Rachel, and carol all offered to be surrigates for me Lol! i haven't even went down that route longer then a passing thought. I do have to say while if the unthinkable Does happen, i would probably go that route for one child. But after that i would just adopt. I've always wanted to adopt, so its not that far from my original plans anyway. oh well till tomarrow, when i find out the plan.
Oh and i packed like 4 boxes today! and started like 3 others YAY me! hehe
Oh and much love to my ohio family. a lot of columbiana is out of power from a huge wind storm that hit monday or tuesday. I know rachel said Friday was the estimate on when they would get it back, or something like that. and Grandma and grandpa out of power also -_-
Love ya guys, and even anyone else who wanders by!
PS: Parents, wild turkeys are mean.... Stopping traffic to let your 8 yr old out of the car to chase them is NOT a good idea.... Now you know, and knowing is half the battle ;)
Thursday, September 11, 2008
got my appointment
Well, if anyone has any experience with tricare, you know its crazy to get to see another doctor, even with a diagnosis of cancer -_- well i got in there about ten, and got into my doctors office, did the general "doctor things" with the nurse, you know blood pressure, temp, all that. well i seemed to have an exeptionally chatty nurse, who proceeded to tell me about how easy it was to get pregnant, and sad to say i even know how her first son was conceived O.o Now, i'm not overly sensitive, or at least i wasn't. But seriously, she knew i had been trying to conceive for over 3 years, that i was just diagnosed with something that potentially could lose me my uterus( hopefully not!) and still jabbers on...>.<
Oh and yea, have any of you ever had the doctor that touches you wayyyyy to much? Not innapropriatly, just random touches. i personally like my little bubble.... and people i don't know intruding makes me uncomfy >.> But anyway. Apparently he was new, and flustered a bit, and a little weird lol. He got on me about smoking, and managed to work in that me smoking caused my UTERAN (is that even a word?) cancer ...... seriously. That doesn;t even make sense in my head...i know what it was caused by, my PCOS.... i don't shedd my lining, the lining decides it has a fun place to party and goes too it. its also a part hyperplasia crap. anywho after touching my knee about 10 times he ran off to try to find the pathology reports that CNY faxed to him. I dont' think he beleived me that i had endometrial cancer...till he saw the papers, he kinda blew me off till he got em, then he took me serious! lol. and when he came in ( touched my knee another 10 times) blubbered through about which doctor he thought tricare would approve, he mentioned a hysterectomy... i told him no. just no Lol. but he later ( after haveing to call CNY, decide which doctor to try for and more knee touching) he "found out" that since its stage one, all the cancer is in my lining. so they do the D&C and hormone therapy just as CNY told me. so then i went and sat with referal for another half an hour, and got my referal, not to the doctor i wanted but one supposably just as good.
although....i think i'm turning into a hyperchondriac, i've been having some random pressure in my pelvic area, and i didn't think anything of it, till i read that that was a symptom of Endometrial cancer....wait isn't that a reverse hypercondriac? I dunno, my moms made me into a sort of wait it out person. i dont' tend to freak over random pains or things, but now i'm starting to worry...its kinda knew to me...i mean take the fact that i twisted my ankle like 2 months and it still hurts but meh i haven't had it checked out LOL.
you know what i'm most scared about at this moment? lol....Driving to this doctors office by myself since jonny is still in wisconsin!! lol i'm such a dork
well i think thats about all thats happened. I'm still sorta taking it in, i haven't cried much....but i have issues looking at kids -_- without at least tearing up. but i'm getting through it, i will get through it and i will have my babies! Thats my mantra!
Jessica
PS: oh! my pathology was sent to a dr at harvard! thats makes me feel all special...in a weird way >.>
pps: in the words of a friend over at myspecialK's : Cancer sucks!!!
Oh and yea, have any of you ever had the doctor that touches you wayyyyy to much? Not innapropriatly, just random touches. i personally like my little bubble.... and people i don't know intruding makes me uncomfy >.> But anyway. Apparently he was new, and flustered a bit, and a little weird lol. He got on me about smoking, and managed to work in that me smoking caused my UTERAN (is that even a word?) cancer ...... seriously. That doesn;t even make sense in my head...i know what it was caused by, my PCOS.... i don't shedd my lining, the lining decides it has a fun place to party and goes too it. its also a part hyperplasia crap. anywho after touching my knee about 10 times he ran off to try to find the pathology reports that CNY faxed to him. I dont' think he beleived me that i had endometrial cancer...till he saw the papers, he kinda blew me off till he got em, then he took me serious! lol. and when he came in ( touched my knee another 10 times) blubbered through about which doctor he thought tricare would approve, he mentioned a hysterectomy... i told him no. just no Lol. but he later ( after haveing to call CNY, decide which doctor to try for and more knee touching) he "found out" that since its stage one, all the cancer is in my lining. so they do the D&C and hormone therapy just as CNY told me. so then i went and sat with referal for another half an hour, and got my referal, not to the doctor i wanted but one supposably just as good.
although....i think i'm turning into a hyperchondriac, i've been having some random pressure in my pelvic area, and i didn't think anything of it, till i read that that was a symptom of Endometrial cancer....wait isn't that a reverse hypercondriac? I dunno, my moms made me into a sort of wait it out person. i dont' tend to freak over random pains or things, but now i'm starting to worry...its kinda knew to me...i mean take the fact that i twisted my ankle like 2 months and it still hurts but meh i haven't had it checked out LOL.
you know what i'm most scared about at this moment? lol....Driving to this doctors office by myself since jonny is still in wisconsin!! lol i'm such a dork
well i think thats about all thats happened. I'm still sorta taking it in, i haven't cried much....but i have issues looking at kids -_- without at least tearing up. but i'm getting through it, i will get through it and i will have my babies! Thats my mantra!
Jessica
PS: oh! my pathology was sent to a dr at harvard! thats makes me feel all special...in a weird way >.>
pps: in the words of a friend over at myspecialK's : Cancer sucks!!!
Monday, September 8, 2008
optimism...still not so great really
Uggg... i'm starting to think this blog is bad luck. lol. apparently my pathology came back and i have stage one endometrial pre-cancer....i think thats what its called. i was so floored, who knows. I'm not even sure what teh difference is, between pre and cancer, or if i heard wrong. i'm just....floored...more later.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Onward!
Well now that I'm done feeling sorry for myself, I'm ready to embrace what was thrown at me and move on. Actually I've been done with my own personal pity party awhile ago, i just hadn't felt like blogging just yet :).
I did some research and asked some questions over on a pcos community, http://www.pcoscommunity.com/index.php ( in case your interested ;)) and i have a bit of a better grasp on Hyperplasia. Its not as scary as i thought, and is actually easy, and a bit benificial for me. I just heard the words Pre cancer and thats what my brain focused on at the time. What happens with a lot of PCOS'ers, is we don't get our monthly visitor. I think the averages is 6 times a year or less. And the lineing builds up, makeing, at least in my cause the cells of my lining go into hyperdrive. Since we don't ovulate, our body's aren't getting the progesterone that's released when the egg deterierates, so the course of action is to take a progesterone pill a few times a month to induce my monthly visitor. Its the same effects as the Birth control, but without the contraceptives ;) I have my list of questions to take in the 16th and then i;ll go from there, :).
But like i said, I am back to optimistic mode, although last night i think i forgot to take my meds, and man i'm paying for it today. I feel all sorts of crappy. although that might have to do with Jonny starting his two week training in wisconsin.
Oh and on top of that, i am in the process of moving back to ohio when jonny does his tour in iraq -_- its incredibly stressful trying to figure what we neede, what we don't need, figuring out housing, and getting ready for Iraq. But the money we will save will be great, and go towards getting me that Hybrid SUV i am soooo dieing for! But i'm gonna get all decor packed away this two weeks and come october we will be whittleing down on essentials. like only haveing two towels, two washclothes, that sort of thing. the hardest will the kitchen i think, but i might wait till after he leaves for that, or at least the majority! lol. anywho Blessed Be!
I did some research and asked some questions over on a pcos community, http://www.pcoscommunity.com/index.php ( in case your interested ;)) and i have a bit of a better grasp on Hyperplasia. Its not as scary as i thought, and is actually easy, and a bit benificial for me. I just heard the words Pre cancer and thats what my brain focused on at the time. What happens with a lot of PCOS'ers, is we don't get our monthly visitor. I think the averages is 6 times a year or less. And the lineing builds up, makeing, at least in my cause the cells of my lining go into hyperdrive. Since we don't ovulate, our body's aren't getting the progesterone that's released when the egg deterierates, so the course of action is to take a progesterone pill a few times a month to induce my monthly visitor. Its the same effects as the Birth control, but without the contraceptives ;) I have my list of questions to take in the 16th and then i;ll go from there, :).
But like i said, I am back to optimistic mode, although last night i think i forgot to take my meds, and man i'm paying for it today. I feel all sorts of crappy. although that might have to do with Jonny starting his two week training in wisconsin.
Oh and on top of that, i am in the process of moving back to ohio when jonny does his tour in iraq -_- its incredibly stressful trying to figure what we neede, what we don't need, figuring out housing, and getting ready for Iraq. But the money we will save will be great, and go towards getting me that Hybrid SUV i am soooo dieing for! But i'm gonna get all decor packed away this two weeks and come october we will be whittleing down on essentials. like only haveing two towels, two washclothes, that sort of thing. the hardest will the kitchen i think, but i might wait till after he leaves for that, or at least the majority! lol. anywho Blessed Be!
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
optimism..not so great really
Welp i went in for my post op appointment, with high hopes to get the baby making underway. and well i got my bubble burst pretty darn quick. Apparently everything "looks" fine, but they sent in a sample of my lineing ( or something) and i guess it raised some flags. apparently i have endometrial hyperplasia. Which i guess is pretty common for PCOS'ers, but something was off on mine, so they sent it for further pathology to determine if its precancer cells or not. I go back in in two weeks to find out, and find out what else we need to do.
Seriously can't i just have my babies :( its all i want :(...
Seriously can't i just have my babies :( its all i want :(...
Saturday, August 30, 2008
no more crud!!!!
Ugg just typing that brought on shivers of remembrance. But me and my belly button are all free of crud! i know disgusting right? But a HUGE relief to me! lol. I also noticed today a bit of bruising, but its that "healthy" yellow color right now, so i'm assuming its normal. But everyday I feel better and better :D although i got hit with a cold smack in the middle of recovery! i had an ear infection, that drained into my glands under my jaw, so i was scared for about 24 hours, since i had a sore throat that wouldn't quit. But i decided to give it one more night and took some flu meds. And the next morning I was noticably better, so yay me for putting off a call to the doctor ;)
But yea i go back tuesday to discuss baby making plans, and what not, so i'm excited about that. Ever since the operation, i've been amazingly optimistic, I don't know if i'm setting myself up for failure or what, but i don't know how else to be. I wasn't thrown another curveball, i know what i'm facing now ( slight Male factor, PCOS,) and it doesn't seem all that insurmountable. I really feel that if i can get ovulating that the rest will be a peice of cake. I just feel it you know? My biggest concern right now, is Jonny has some training in wisconsin for two weeks in September. Knowing me, i'll decide to ovulate then, you watch. We do have some of his little men "stored' but i'm not sure how that works.... if we can use and add to it lol, or if its a one time thing. Things to ask on tuesday i'm sure!
anywho a bit of fun for you :
This is what happens when you get to the drive in two hours early >.>
See he decided to see how close he could get the chair to the steering wheel >.> my oddball hubby
and one for cuteness : my nieces, heather and Harleigh
But yea i go back tuesday to discuss baby making plans, and what not, so i'm excited about that. Ever since the operation, i've been amazingly optimistic, I don't know if i'm setting myself up for failure or what, but i don't know how else to be. I wasn't thrown another curveball, i know what i'm facing now ( slight Male factor, PCOS,) and it doesn't seem all that insurmountable. I really feel that if i can get ovulating that the rest will be a peice of cake. I just feel it you know? My biggest concern right now, is Jonny has some training in wisconsin for two weeks in September. Knowing me, i'll decide to ovulate then, you watch. We do have some of his little men "stored' but i'm not sure how that works.... if we can use and add to it lol, or if its a one time thing. Things to ask on tuesday i'm sure!
anywho a bit of fun for you :
This is what happens when you get to the drive in two hours early >.>
See he decided to see how close he could get the chair to the steering wheel >.> my oddball hubby
and one for cuteness : my nieces, heather and Harleigh
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
after surgery
well i had the surgery yesterday, and i have to tell you, it wasn't near as bad as i made myself think it would be! we had to wait in the prep room for about an hour and a half, apparently the person before me, her surgery went a bit long. But really that was the only bad part. Oh and those stupid ( but needed) blood clot compression socks -_-;;;
I went in the O.R. and was talking to the anesthesiologist (sp) and next thing you know i was waking up and seriously annoyed that something was stuck to my forehead... One of the nurses came in and asked how i was, and i just said thirsty and asked what was on my forhead LOL. But about 20 minutes later i was dressed and being wheeled out to the car. and not because they wanted to get rid of me, but just 'cause i was ready to go! ( i was starving!) We picked up some food came home and i felt fine. My shoulder hurt from teh gas they out in you tummy, and i wasn't doing jumping jacks anytime soon but i was walking around the house, even made a crab dip ;)
Then, when i was trying to find the incision scars, i touched my belly button.... I guess to understand my distress you should know i hate belly buttons. noone can touch mine without inflicting a gag reflex, nor can i touch other peoples. I can barely even touch my own, and that took tons of conditioning >.> but i touched my belly button adn its FULL of glue :( its like a little plug and its making my stomach turn just thinking about it -_- i just want to get it out :( but i'm afraid i'll open the incision, so that is the ONLY thing keeping me from digging it out.... bah.
But anyway the Surgery went great, i didn't even have the polyp that the other DR. said i had, And dr kiltz said everything was dandy and working, no scar tissue or anything, and clear tubes. IF we can get me to ovulate we'll be dandy. At least i know thats all i'm battleing at the moment. and with the ovarian drilling and metforming i am highly positive that something will come of this :D just hope/pray/wish that i don't ovulate while jonny is takeing that military class for 2 weeks in sept >.>
anyway friends, remember you don't need an account to post a comment, and much love :D
I went in the O.R. and was talking to the anesthesiologist (sp) and next thing you know i was waking up and seriously annoyed that something was stuck to my forehead... One of the nurses came in and asked how i was, and i just said thirsty and asked what was on my forhead LOL. But about 20 minutes later i was dressed and being wheeled out to the car. and not because they wanted to get rid of me, but just 'cause i was ready to go! ( i was starving!) We picked up some food came home and i felt fine. My shoulder hurt from teh gas they out in you tummy, and i wasn't doing jumping jacks anytime soon but i was walking around the house, even made a crab dip ;)
Then, when i was trying to find the incision scars, i touched my belly button.... I guess to understand my distress you should know i hate belly buttons. noone can touch mine without inflicting a gag reflex, nor can i touch other peoples. I can barely even touch my own, and that took tons of conditioning >.> but i touched my belly button adn its FULL of glue :( its like a little plug and its making my stomach turn just thinking about it -_- i just want to get it out :( but i'm afraid i'll open the incision, so that is the ONLY thing keeping me from digging it out.... bah.
But anyway the Surgery went great, i didn't even have the polyp that the other DR. said i had, And dr kiltz said everything was dandy and working, no scar tissue or anything, and clear tubes. IF we can get me to ovulate we'll be dandy. At least i know thats all i'm battleing at the moment. and with the ovarian drilling and metforming i am highly positive that something will come of this :D just hope/pray/wish that i don't ovulate while jonny is takeing that military class for 2 weeks in sept >.>
anyway friends, remember you don't need an account to post a comment, and much love :D
Monday, August 25, 2008
The surgery, day before
well, they called i have my appt. tomarrow at 10am. At least its not at the butt crack of dawn >.> lol. but i doubt i'll get much sleep tonight regardless. She said it would be between 1/2 an hour to an hour and a half, with round about 2 hours recovery. We should be home later in the evening if anyone wants to call and see how it went, i'll probably be sleeping though ;)
I'm hella nervous but i'll get over it :D that and a darn ear infection that snuck up on me. but even thats getting better. anyway short post for now, maybe this afternoon I'll post on our trip to A-Bay sunday. got some awesome pictures :) those are on my myspace as i type so check em out :)
off to go get my pain meds
Jessica
I'm hella nervous but i'll get over it :D that and a darn ear infection that snuck up on me. but even thats getting better. anyway short post for now, maybe this afternoon I'll post on our trip to A-Bay sunday. got some awesome pictures :) those are on my myspace as i type so check em out :)
off to go get my pain meds
Jessica
Saturday, August 23, 2008
garage sales!
So the base had a "base wide community garage sale" today. I was up at 7 am and out there till 4ish. I must say, I'm TIRED!! It was a lot more work then i thought it would be. But i happily got rid of lots of "junk" ;) I got rid of my old liveing room set ( YAY!) and old microwave, adn tons of other stuff. I even made a bit of money. I went in with my neighbors to pull in more people since most of my stuff was bigger items. It went really well i think all together, and beleive it or not, I was social!!!!!!!
My mom also made it up :D i'm excited, even though its being shadowed by the impending surgery, but one day at a time. Tomarrow its up to alexandria bay for the 1,000 island boat tour/boydts castle tour. 4 years and i still haven't done the tourist thing up here >.>
Oh and My Dr's office sent me all the info on the surgery's' the other day. I'm in love with this place, they are just so organized, so thoughtful, and such a change form Dreaded Dr. D. I know I'm in good hands with them, but that doesn't stop the nerves all the way!
My mom also made it up :D i'm excited, even though its being shadowed by the impending surgery, but one day at a time. Tomarrow its up to alexandria bay for the 1,000 island boat tour/boydts castle tour. 4 years and i still haven't done the tourist thing up here >.>
Oh and My Dr's office sent me all the info on the surgery's' the other day. I'm in love with this place, they are just so organized, so thoughtful, and such a change form Dreaded Dr. D. I know I'm in good hands with them, but that doesn't stop the nerves all the way!
Friday, August 22, 2008
i should be ...
Cleaning... But i just woke up and i cna't bring myself to do much of anything the first hour or so after i wake up. I've let the house go in the last few days, with the getting Jonny ready, and just plain no 'gumption'. But now, i have a garage sale tomarrow, my mom is coming up, also tomarrow, for my surgery on Tuesday. So it really needs done. there's Boxes everywhere >.<
I already went out and said hello to the all my neighbors on the front lawn >.> Thats where they all hang out, causing my dogs to bark on and off all day. I wish they would just get used to it. I hate barking dogs, i always feel like it bothers my neighbors, which is silly since they are all out in yard. I'm sorta the outcast, since i'm sort of a hermit ><;; Plus i really feel odd not having kids yet on an army base O.o i swear if you have housing and no kids, they look at you like you have the plague! But i've been better being slightly more social -_- i finally know their names now! I've strategically worked conversations for the last year to not having to use them >.> ugh well off to clean!!!!! anyone know a good maid? LOL
I already went out and said hello to the all my neighbors on the front lawn >.> Thats where they all hang out, causing my dogs to bark on and off all day. I wish they would just get used to it. I hate barking dogs, i always feel like it bothers my neighbors, which is silly since they are all out in yard. I'm sorta the outcast, since i'm sort of a hermit ><;; Plus i really feel odd not having kids yet on an army base O.o i swear if you have housing and no kids, they look at you like you have the plague! But i've been better being slightly more social -_- i finally know their names now! I've strategically worked conversations for the last year to not having to use them >.> ugh well off to clean!!!!! anyone know a good maid? LOL
Thursday, August 21, 2008
silly army -_-
Ug so generally i love being a military wife. It suits us pretty well, minus the deployments. But even then we've only had one in about 5 years. From what i remember, that deployment went smoothly, with little to no hiccups. This deployment on the other hand...
They're set to leave in october, and a little over a week ago they were told they had till sept7th to get their tough boxes( the personal stuff they want to take) and I'm not sure the date on their actual equipment. After being told that, like the next day the date was changed to, well, tomarrow. So he's been out late everyday this week, he isn't even home now, and its 7pm -_-. and he hasn't even finished his tough box at home. its hard to plan what you think you might want over there for a year in less then a week. His Unit has just been rushing like mad men this deployment. We've known about it for months and months, you think they wouldn't wait till the last minute.
Then to top it off, he has to go to a class in Virginia for two weeks in september:( Which don't get me wrong lots of the men in his unit are much worse of, i know some have had back to back gunnery's and classes, barely seeing their families for a day or two and then running off again. AND still haveing to get their stuff packed and ready by tomarrow. But it still makes me sad.
Although it will give me boredom motivation to pack more >.> I'm getting ready to try and move back to ohio when he leaves. If all goes well i would like to be preggers then and like last post keep trying after he leaves, and i don't want to be alone with no family while doing all that. Its incredibly hard to pack up while still trying to live here Lol. you never know what you might need >.>
anyway back to waiting for him to get home <3
They're set to leave in october, and a little over a week ago they were told they had till sept7th to get their tough boxes( the personal stuff they want to take) and I'm not sure the date on their actual equipment. After being told that, like the next day the date was changed to, well, tomarrow. So he's been out late everyday this week, he isn't even home now, and its 7pm -_-. and he hasn't even finished his tough box at home. its hard to plan what you think you might want over there for a year in less then a week. His Unit has just been rushing like mad men this deployment. We've known about it for months and months, you think they wouldn't wait till the last minute.
Then to top it off, he has to go to a class in Virginia for two weeks in september:( Which don't get me wrong lots of the men in his unit are much worse of, i know some have had back to back gunnery's and classes, barely seeing their families for a day or two and then running off again. AND still haveing to get their stuff packed and ready by tomarrow. But it still makes me sad.
Although it will give me boredom motivation to pack more >.> I'm getting ready to try and move back to ohio when he leaves. If all goes well i would like to be preggers then and like last post keep trying after he leaves, and i don't want to be alone with no family while doing all that. Its incredibly hard to pack up while still trying to live here Lol. you never know what you might need >.>
anyway back to waiting for him to get home <3
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
what happened next
anyway, i went in for the dye test, and i tell you what. That test needs a disclaimer. Its incredibly unomfortable -_-;;; but turns out i have a polyp in my uterus, ><. when it rains it pours i suppose.
The follow up appt to the dye test was god aweful. I brought my mother along, she's my resident doctor, lol. I call her concerning all things medical, since she's in that field. But she drove all the way up here from Ohio, just to ask the doctor questions about PCOS. It was like talking to a brick wall. every question we asked he gave yes or no answers. I asked what my husbands sperm count was and he went into a ten minute lecture on what was wrong with his sperm >.> I still don't know what the count was lol. He also didn't want to do anything with the polyp that was blocking my ovary, he wanted to just ignore it -_-. which i guess, greatly increases my chance of entropic ( i think thats what its called) pregnancy. But anyway i was so fed up towards the end i wanted a new Dr, and low and behold he pushed me off to another Specialist. so then i had to wait another month just to get into these people.
waiting wouldn't be to bad, except I'm trying really hard to get pregnant before my husbands deployment. which is in october. and i wasn't getting into Dr. Kiltz' office till july -_-. Mind you i started this in april.
anyway absolutly LOVE this new dr's office. they were so helpful, and told me a lot about PCOS and what goes along with it. Turns out i should have been on medication for it Months ago. So now i'm taking Glumetza ( metformin) for my insulin resistance, and synthroid for a slightly abnormal thyroid. Its a crazy amount of glumetza, 2000 mgs a day, but its Extended release, so my side effects are about nil. Except when i eat too many carbs -_- then i spend the day getting to know the bathroom by memory ;) But i'm learning, mostly by trial and error what are good carbs, bad carbs and how much of each i can eat a day. Right now we're waiting to see if my periods regulate, with just metformin alone.
Oh and i also have surgery this tuesday, a laproscopy, hyster-something or other, ovarian drilling ( sounds worse then it is) and to get the polyp removed. Its a day surgery and i'll be out the same day. but i will be intibated, and i'm scared :( But Ovarian drilling alone has a 50ish % succcess rate of pregnancy within the first year. and OH we get a military discount on freezing Jonny's little men :D sooooo i'll get to keep trying after he leaves. Now the rumors on who i slept with when he was gone, is a whole 'nother story. But we know the truth and thats all that matters :D
well thats about as up to date as i can get on the fertility battle. Now we can get ti everyday posting, like how jonny's unit is crazy -_- but thats for a later date :)
~jessica
The follow up appt to the dye test was god aweful. I brought my mother along, she's my resident doctor, lol. I call her concerning all things medical, since she's in that field. But she drove all the way up here from Ohio, just to ask the doctor questions about PCOS. It was like talking to a brick wall. every question we asked he gave yes or no answers. I asked what my husbands sperm count was and he went into a ten minute lecture on what was wrong with his sperm >.> I still don't know what the count was lol. He also didn't want to do anything with the polyp that was blocking my ovary, he wanted to just ignore it -_-. which i guess, greatly increases my chance of entropic ( i think thats what its called) pregnancy. But anyway i was so fed up towards the end i wanted a new Dr, and low and behold he pushed me off to another Specialist. so then i had to wait another month just to get into these people.
waiting wouldn't be to bad, except I'm trying really hard to get pregnant before my husbands deployment. which is in october. and i wasn't getting into Dr. Kiltz' office till july -_-. Mind you i started this in april.
anyway absolutly LOVE this new dr's office. they were so helpful, and told me a lot about PCOS and what goes along with it. Turns out i should have been on medication for it Months ago. So now i'm taking Glumetza ( metformin) for my insulin resistance, and synthroid for a slightly abnormal thyroid. Its a crazy amount of glumetza, 2000 mgs a day, but its Extended release, so my side effects are about nil. Except when i eat too many carbs -_- then i spend the day getting to know the bathroom by memory ;) But i'm learning, mostly by trial and error what are good carbs, bad carbs and how much of each i can eat a day. Right now we're waiting to see if my periods regulate, with just metformin alone.
Oh and i also have surgery this tuesday, a laproscopy, hyster-something or other, ovarian drilling ( sounds worse then it is) and to get the polyp removed. Its a day surgery and i'll be out the same day. but i will be intibated, and i'm scared :( But Ovarian drilling alone has a 50ish % succcess rate of pregnancy within the first year. and OH we get a military discount on freezing Jonny's little men :D sooooo i'll get to keep trying after he leaves. Now the rumors on who i slept with when he was gone, is a whole 'nother story. But we know the truth and thats all that matters :D
well thats about as up to date as i can get on the fertility battle. Now we can get ti everyday posting, like how jonny's unit is crazy -_- but thats for a later date :)
~jessica
long ago....
So here's what all has happened. Me and jonny, have been trying to have a baby for almost three years, maybe more now. I really am awful at gageing time -_-;;. so after much putting off i finally go to a gynocologist, for a regular check up, and a referal. Tricare works all weird. you have to have a reference to go to a "speciality" doctor.
Well after being reprimanded like 8 times for not coming in sooner ( it had been like 6 years >.> ) i got my tests done and a referal for a Dr, lets call him Dr. D :)
I couldn't get into him till the next month or so. But the next morning i get a call from the pap smear Dr. But of course i was sleeping so all i got was Jonny calling me the dr called him and that it was important that i call him back.... Okay so right then i think i had a heart attack. I had every possible horrible diagnoses going through my head in a matter of a minute... so I rush ( rather groggily to a phone and try to call him back. and of course he wasn't there.... so for about an hour, I fretted adn stressed waiting for the call back. I was sure i had cancer, or something of the like. He finally calls back... turns out i had an infection, thats it.... i nearly collapsed. he also told me that it could be why i was having trouble conceiveing. false hope #1 lol.
well i took my meds, got put on prenatals, and waited to see Dr. D. He was interesting when i first got there. It was just sort of a "get to know you appt" we sat in a room, and he asked questions, i answered then he proceeded to talk so fast that to this day, i have no clue what he was talking about.I know i heard disorder or syndrome in there somewhere. He ordered blood work, and an ultrasound, and sent me on my way. Oh and a lovely semen analysis for Jonny.
I was actually concerned a bit for jon's semen analysis, you all those tv shows, where the men freak out over it. Its like taking a jab at their masculinity or so they portray it. He's been amazing about it though, i could just kiss him for being such a trooper :) actually i think i did :D
But the Blood work, ultrasound and semen came back. I was then diagnosed with PCOS ( poly cystic ovarian syndrome) and jons semen analysis came back abnormal. Honestly the first thought in my head was " well...shit." from what i understood it isn't impossible to get pregnant, but its definetly going to be interesting.
I know now, about MY Pcos, but at the time, Dr. D didn't tell me anything, or suggest how to manage it, or even what it was aside from a hormone imbalance and cysts on my ovaries. I tried to ask him questions but he either wasn't listening or didn;t know. Everything, until recently, i learned about PCOS was from the internet. PCOS is an Insulin resistance, that screws with everything. The IR causes to much testosterone in your system, causeing hairgrowth and thick ovarian skin ( i don't know if thats a word >.>) The fertility issues stems from because of all that, i can't seem to ovulate very well. we only have a few periods a year, and some ( not all) become overweight because of all that.
but he ( dr d) decided to do a dye test, and that teh plan of action beside that was Clomid, adn then IUI's. Clomid is a drug that helps stimulate growth in your ovarians, helping us to ovulate. and IUI's is where you ovualate, adn they put sperm directly into your uterus. So as far as i knew that was what was going to happen. and that was back in may -_-
Well after being reprimanded like 8 times for not coming in sooner ( it had been like 6 years >.> ) i got my tests done and a referal for a Dr, lets call him Dr. D :)
I couldn't get into him till the next month or so. But the next morning i get a call from the pap smear Dr. But of course i was sleeping so all i got was Jonny calling me the dr called him and that it was important that i call him back.... Okay so right then i think i had a heart attack. I had every possible horrible diagnoses going through my head in a matter of a minute... so I rush ( rather groggily to a phone and try to call him back. and of course he wasn't there.... so for about an hour, I fretted adn stressed waiting for the call back. I was sure i had cancer, or something of the like. He finally calls back... turns out i had an infection, thats it.... i nearly collapsed. he also told me that it could be why i was having trouble conceiveing. false hope #1 lol.
well i took my meds, got put on prenatals, and waited to see Dr. D. He was interesting when i first got there. It was just sort of a "get to know you appt" we sat in a room, and he asked questions, i answered then he proceeded to talk so fast that to this day, i have no clue what he was talking about.I know i heard disorder or syndrome in there somewhere. He ordered blood work, and an ultrasound, and sent me on my way. Oh and a lovely semen analysis for Jonny.
I was actually concerned a bit for jon's semen analysis, you all those tv shows, where the men freak out over it. Its like taking a jab at their masculinity or so they portray it. He's been amazing about it though, i could just kiss him for being such a trooper :) actually i think i did :D
But the Blood work, ultrasound and semen came back. I was then diagnosed with PCOS ( poly cystic ovarian syndrome) and jons semen analysis came back abnormal. Honestly the first thought in my head was " well...shit." from what i understood it isn't impossible to get pregnant, but its definetly going to be interesting.
I know now, about MY Pcos, but at the time, Dr. D didn't tell me anything, or suggest how to manage it, or even what it was aside from a hormone imbalance and cysts on my ovaries. I tried to ask him questions but he either wasn't listening or didn;t know. Everything, until recently, i learned about PCOS was from the internet. PCOS is an Insulin resistance, that screws with everything. The IR causes to much testosterone in your system, causeing hairgrowth and thick ovarian skin ( i don't know if thats a word >.>) The fertility issues stems from because of all that, i can't seem to ovulate very well. we only have a few periods a year, and some ( not all) become overweight because of all that.
but he ( dr d) decided to do a dye test, and that teh plan of action beside that was Clomid, adn then IUI's. Clomid is a drug that helps stimulate growth in your ovarians, helping us to ovulate. and IUI's is where you ovualate, adn they put sperm directly into your uterus. So as far as i knew that was what was going to happen. and that was back in may -_-
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Okay I lied...
I decided to attempt this tonight. At least part-way. Maybe give you a bit of a backround on my family. hehe.
Well, there is me, Jessica, I'm 24, and currently a housewife. I had an excellent job working with devolepmentally disabled Individuals, I had the time of my life there, it was an ICF, and the 10 people in the house were 38+ years, but man they kept me on my toes :D but lack of two cars caused me to put that on hold.
I grew up in Ohio, in a small town, but i miss it everyday. I now live with my husband of 4 years at an army base called Fort Drum, in upstate NY. Its not a bad life, and we've been lucky, only one deployment, and one inc deployment in those 4 years.
I'm a very novice artist, but i only dabble, i've thought of going to school for it but we'll see ;).
Then there is Jonathan, my love and light. He's 26....er 27 ( I'm horrid at that i swear!) He's in the army like i said, lol, and he is a NBC, nuclear biological chemical. He's even edumacated, and has a chemical engineering degree! We're hoping that he gets Officer approved while he's in Iraq, as long as everything checks out :D
He also grew up in ohio near me, but different school district. We actually met when he was my boss at Mcdonalds, when I was 15. took me a LONG year of "woo'ing" but i finally got him to date me when i was 16! the rest as we say, is history!!!
there's also two other members of our family...my "kids" at the moment. You'll here a lot about them i'm sure. i dote on them like no others. First is my old lady, Kira, my australian shepard mix. She came to us at a very special time about 6-7 years ago. I had no intention of keeping kira, see a friend's dog had puppies, and i knew most of the people he let the puppies go home with. One of the Girls parents, threw a fit, and she was going to toss this little defenseless puppy in the woods :( well i couldn't let that happen, at all... so i took her, thinking i was just going to return her to her mom, and litter mates. But first, a pit stop.....
See My mom was haveing a horrid time with her divorce, and could barely get out of bed. So i decided some puppy therapy was in order!! I came home, tossed Kira on the bed ( okay not tossed, calmly place rather :P ) and 6-7 years old she's my darling old gal. she never did come close to making it back to the litter >.>
The other is my little man of the house,salem, who just turned two in january. He's my long haired chihauhua :) he's all red with this weird white stocking thats spotted red....it looks like someone hastily wrapped a bandage on his foot. All the time people ask me how he hurt himself >< He's been a crazy addition who gets away with murder....i don't even think he knows how to sit.... Don't get me wrong he's pretty well trained. he's house trained, knows not to beg, although he tries, knows general commands, and stays with me in the community yard off leash. Just tricks are beyond his attention span Lol.
thats my family crazy insane as they are, i love em. Now i swear, tomarrow i will write about what i intend to write most about. My infertility issues, and what not. good fun right? well mebbe not. >.> ^ ^ see ya
Jessica
kira ^ ^ looking all cute
salem, although you can't see his paw >.>
omg he actually looks like a chihauhua here!!!!!!!!! Lol silly floppy/lazy ears
this is Jonny, and this is the first thing he did upon entering the house when he got back from his first tour LOL ( we really don't drink that much, and me not at all anymore lol)
Well, there is me, Jessica, I'm 24, and currently a housewife. I had an excellent job working with devolepmentally disabled Individuals, I had the time of my life there, it was an ICF, and the 10 people in the house were 38+ years, but man they kept me on my toes :D but lack of two cars caused me to put that on hold.
I grew up in Ohio, in a small town, but i miss it everyday. I now live with my husband of 4 years at an army base called Fort Drum, in upstate NY. Its not a bad life, and we've been lucky, only one deployment, and one inc deployment in those 4 years.
I'm a very novice artist, but i only dabble, i've thought of going to school for it but we'll see ;).
Then there is Jonathan, my love and light. He's 26....er 27 ( I'm horrid at that i swear!) He's in the army like i said, lol, and he is a NBC, nuclear biological chemical. He's even edumacated, and has a chemical engineering degree! We're hoping that he gets Officer approved while he's in Iraq, as long as everything checks out :D
He also grew up in ohio near me, but different school district. We actually met when he was my boss at Mcdonalds, when I was 15. took me a LONG year of "woo'ing" but i finally got him to date me when i was 16! the rest as we say, is history!!!
there's also two other members of our family...my "kids" at the moment. You'll here a lot about them i'm sure. i dote on them like no others. First is my old lady, Kira, my australian shepard mix. She came to us at a very special time about 6-7 years ago. I had no intention of keeping kira, see a friend's dog had puppies, and i knew most of the people he let the puppies go home with. One of the Girls parents, threw a fit, and she was going to toss this little defenseless puppy in the woods :( well i couldn't let that happen, at all... so i took her, thinking i was just going to return her to her mom, and litter mates. But first, a pit stop.....
See My mom was haveing a horrid time with her divorce, and could barely get out of bed. So i decided some puppy therapy was in order!! I came home, tossed Kira on the bed ( okay not tossed, calmly place rather :P ) and 6-7 years old she's my darling old gal. she never did come close to making it back to the litter >.>
The other is my little man of the house,salem, who just turned two in january. He's my long haired chihauhua :) he's all red with this weird white stocking thats spotted red....it looks like someone hastily wrapped a bandage on his foot. All the time people ask me how he hurt himself >< He's been a crazy addition who gets away with murder....i don't even think he knows how to sit.... Don't get me wrong he's pretty well trained. he's house trained, knows not to beg, although he tries, knows general commands, and stays with me in the community yard off leash. Just tricks are beyond his attention span Lol.
thats my family crazy insane as they are, i love em. Now i swear, tomarrow i will write about what i intend to write most about. My infertility issues, and what not. good fun right? well mebbe not. >.> ^ ^ see ya
Jessica
kira ^ ^ looking all cute
salem, although you can't see his paw >.>
omg he actually looks like a chihauhua here!!!!!!!!! Lol silly floppy/lazy ears
this is Jonny, and this is the first thing he did upon entering the house when he got back from his first tour LOL ( we really don't drink that much, and me not at all anymore lol)
Just starting off...
Welp, here I am. I don't know why exactly i'm starting this, I'm not much of a writer. But i've been wanting to make sort of a running dialogue of us ( me and my husband) trying to have children, military life, so on. I'll post tomarrow i think, I'm not feeling well at all today, on a summery of what's happened so far in the last 6 months. anywho enough for now :)
~Jessica
~Jessica
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